During House Renovations - Scrubbing Day with Pippi Longstocking

When I was little I used to have amazing birthday parties and when I got a bit older I used to have amazing sleepover birthday parties.  After all the party games and the salad platter and the giant bucket of Kentucky Fried Chicken (before it became KFC) and the oranges filled with jelly and ... no wait, I'm going to have to write a separate post about how much I enjoyed my birthday parties.  Moving on - after all that, we would fill the loungeroom with mattresses and get into pyjamas and sleeping bags ready to watch videos.

My parents would hire a VCR for the occassion (a VCR is like a BluRay Machine Thingy or a DVD Player but chunkier).  This would happen for my birthday in June and again for my sister's in July.  In my mind my parents hired a VCR, returned it, hired it again and returned it again for several years in a row before they thought to purchase one.  I'm pretty sure other people were using VCRs on a daily basis but it was a special birthday treat for us.

Every year my parents would hire two movies - 'The New Adventures of Pippi Longstocking' and 'Who Framed Roger Rabbit?'.  I loved those movies and I reckon we watched them every year, I suppose it was twice a year, throughout our childhood.  The only thing I remember from Pippi Longstocking is the theme song and the part of this clip from 0:15 - 0:16 but this preview makes me want to watch the movie again.



Getting closer to the point...

I was pleased to find polished floorboards in the bedroom, except for the half a dozen that were replaced with plain timber after the cellar fire of 1999.   I was again pleased to find polished floorboards in the loungeroom.  I was not pleased to find them encrusted with the black rubber of the underlay that had been crushed into the wood over at least 30 years.

After scraping off the majority of the black rubber, which was like super adhesive charcoal, it was time to scrub the floor.

Enter Pippi Longstocking.

Sadly, there were handles on my scrubbing brushes so I couldn't strap them to my feet and glide across the room but after more scraping and lots of scrubbing, I strapped paper towels to my feet to lightly clean the floor, or was it to dry the floor?  Either way, it was most efficient and made me feel like I was Pippi Longstocking.

Pippi Longstocking is coming into your world.

More photos of me mucking around during House Renovations:
During House Renovations - Flipping Underlay Residue
During House Renovations - The Varnish Discovery 


Photos of House Renovations where I'm not mucking around:
House Renovations - Bedroom
House Renovations - Loungeroom

A tragic story about curtains which features the loungeroom floorboards:
Out, damned spot! Out, I say!

Mastery!...Let the spectacle astound you!

When I do something amazing I think of this song and replace 'Masquerade' with 'Mastery'.  All the other lyrics are replaced by the inspirational words 'la la la la la la la'. 

MASTERY = MASSIVE ACHIEVEMENT

Excitement & Pride

Ignore the last few seconds of the clip.  Replace them with this image of me filled with excitement and pride.  I took this photo in 2006 immediately after being accepted into a Bachelor of Speech Pathology at Flinders Uni.  It almost emulates the exhilaration I felt as a result of today's massive achievement.  That's right - I emptied and re-stacked the dishwasher!!!  You'd think that having a dishwasher would mean I'd have no trouble washing dishes, right?  Well, the last two times the dishwasher needed emptying I left it until almost all the other dishes had been used then The Dishwasher Fairy emptied it for me.  Both occassions suspiciously coincided with my Dad staying at my house.  I wonder if he saw The Dishwasher Fairy.


This time, not only did I empty the dishwasher but I re-stacked it AND made 2 minute noodles AT THE SAME TIME!  I guess that's what happens when I wake up from a 14 hour nap with no idea what day it is.

Next time I empty the dishwasher I'm going to try to get it done BEFORE the dirty dishes start collecting on the sink.  Ambitious, I know.  There were only 10 today which is pretty good.  Let's make it ZERO dishes waiting to be washed when I empty the dishwasher next time. 

The record to beat:

I mixed stuff! In a bowl!

I was feeling hungry so I made some mini damper-short-naan-scone-biscuits.  My favourite.  No, I figured I would throw some stuff in a bowl and see what happened.  I watched a pencil and a piece of chewing gum for 45 minutes and they didn't move so instead I mixed together flour, eggs, butter and milk.

It astounds me that I thought to combine ingredients to create something.  It must be the first time I have ever spontaneously thought I could make something edible using things that alone are fairly inedible.

FLOUR...EGGS...BUTTER...MILK

By your powers combined...

I am mini damper-short-naan-scone-biscuits.

Bum Pits

Bum Pits

You've got arm pits, but what about bum pits?

Here's hoping the maker of this sign isn't doing the labelling.

Who?  What?

Firstly, I used to joke around saying "That makes no sense, what does 'I heart New York' mean?" a long time before people started using the symbol or word "heart" to replace the word "love".

Secondly, even if you transposed "love" over the red heart shape, these letter-looking shapes make no sense.

Even if you translate "sale" into Italian so it means "salt", why would anyone in their right mind "big fat read heart shape big fat salt"?

Maybe there's a person named "Sale".  Sorry, Sale.

Cower on the ground for the holographic shark is not far off.

As I walked from Citi Cross into Rundle Mall I thought there was a serious storm transpiring.

So many blasts of lightning!  So bright!

It turned out to be a gigantic screen which would black out then surge a shock of light every few seconds, surely causing people with epilepsy, or eyes, to be in danger.

UPDATE: I've added a clip of the holographic shark.  It's less than 3 years away.  So are hover cars, hover boards, self-drying jackets and retractable fruit bowls.

Finding a Photo of Dad

To match my unfinished driveway and unfinished floorboards, I have an unfinished display of family photos.  It has been particularly bothersome that for the past few months I have had portraits of my Mum, my sister and me next to half a dozen empty picture hooks because I couldn't find a good photo of my Dad and therefore gave up finding ANY other photos.

The 'N' key on my keyboard has almost completely worn off.  What is up with that?  Do I have an inexplicably exuberant usage of words containing 'N'?

In my recent search for a photo of Dad I discovered a veritable treasure trove of photos I have taken of Dad taking photos.

Some great shots I've taken of Dad:

Clockwise (from left):

• Dad lying on the ground photographing a light house.
• Dad standing up photographing a light house (different light house, different holiday).
• Dad and a light house being very tiny (they are in the distance) while Mum sits on a park bench looking out to sea, or possibly having a nap.

I remember that moment well because it was immediately after I almost stepped on a snake and my first instinct was to take a quick happy snap of it as it slithered back into the long grass.  Then I looked at the photo I'd taken.  Then I looked to where the snake had disappeared.  Then I stood still for half a minute trying to remember if you're supposed to stand completely still if you see a snake or if you're meant to run as fast as you can. 

Then I remembered the very useful fact that in order to escape a crocodile you need to run in a zig-zagged line.  Apparently the crocodile has a very wide turning circle and will not be able to co-ordinate itself to follow your haphazard escape route so will not succeed in catching and chomping you. 

Then I remembered I'd seen a snake, not a crocodile.  I checked the photo to make sure.  Then I speed-walked (in between running and standing still) to the park bench.

I can't be bothered posting ALL the sensational photos I've taken of Dad but here is a quick summary of the gems I had to choose from when looking to frame Dad on the wall with the rest of the family.

• Dad squatting in the dirt of a runway photographing glider take-offs and landings.
• Dad (with cap on backwards) leaning on the permapine railing of the meerkat enclosure in the zoo photographing the meerkats.
• Dad (with cap on backwards) leaning on the permapine railing of the meerkat enclosure in the zoo photographing the giraffes whose enclosure is behind the meerkats.
• Dad (with cap on backwards) leaning on the permapine railing on the edge of a cliff to photograph some dogs on an island in the distance, or maybe it was migrating birds on a rock, or a light house on a distant shore.
• Dad carrying a camera tripod ready to photograph the information displays inside a slab hut.
• Dad about to enter the slab hut with his camera tripod with the top of the light house from the TV show 'Round the Twist' peeking over the roof.

If you've ever seen 'Round the Twist' you will now have the song stuck in your head.  That is, of course, if readership of my blog increases to more than just me.  Mind you, I HAVE seen 'Round the Twist so I DO now have the song stuck in my head so that renders the clause useless. 

"Have you ever?

Ever felt like this?

How strange things happen,

Are you going round the twist?..."

 Just in case you've never seen it or you've forgotten.

I was well and truly spoilt for choice.  It was hard to decide which photo of Dad went best with the ones of my sister and I in formal dresses.

• Dad perching precariously on the back of a motor boat photographing kneeboarders being towed by a different boat than the one we were spectating from.
• Dad balancing in his motor boat photographing the cliffs along the River Murray, taken by me when I should have been driving the boat.
• Dad taking a photo of me at the beach taking a photo of him taking a photo of me.
• Dad standing on a jetty taking a photo of me snorkelling taking a photo of him taking a photo of me.

In the end I got one of my sister's wedding photos, cropped my sister out and voila! a photo of Dad for my lounge room wall.